Boundaries: Real Talk with Coffee

Boundaries: Real Talk with Coffee


Hi folks! Marie here for some real talk
with coffee. I just wanted to hop in today to say that
nobody can respect boundaries that they don’t know. And I’ve been
thinking about this a lot; I have talked to a lot of people about setting
boundaries, figuring out what your boundaries are, all that; but I would think about all
the times I get frustrated with my children or my spouse or other people in my
life when they have sort of invaded, they crossed a boundary with me, right? They’ve tried to talk to me when I wasn’t ready to listen, or they
touched my body more than I wanted to be touched – i.e. my oldest child; or whatever it is. And one thing I realized is that nobody can
actually respect a boundary that they don’t know about. And sometimes it feels
like we have to communicate boundaries more than we should have to – and I will
say, I’ll speak for myself as a woman, and being raised as a girl and then a
woman, I know that I find it uncomfortable sometimes to communicate
boundaries to people because my underlying feeling is that I should be
available to everybody: physically mentally, all the time. I know that’s not
true, but I always feel a little… it feels hard for me to name those boundaries and
say them to other people. But it’s something we have to do; and it’s something we have to
do routinely, and I think it’s so important, something that we need to
model for our kids. So today I just want you to take a minute to think about what
boundaries you have, maybe what boundaries have been crossed for you recently; and
really think “How can I communicate this if I haven’t already? – because nobody
can respect a boundary that they don’t know about, even when it’s hard to tell
them.” All right, so that’s just a thought I had… I am curious, feel free to
add something in the comments if you have some thoughts about that, and I want to be
super clear that in sharing this, that I also know that some boundaries should
absolutely be respected whether or not they’re communicated, right? And so I’m
thinking more about those boundaries we have with our children or people in our
lives, where we do need to communicate them maybe more clearly than we have
been, but also acknowledging that some boundaries should always be respected
and we need to shout that from the ceiling! All right, thank you so much for
watching!

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